Tips on Negotiating a Custody Schedule

While some divorcing parents agree completely on a custody schedule from the start, most need to negotiate for a while. Of course, negotiating with your soon-to-be-ex can be tricky. Here are our time-tested tips.

Know why you're negotiating a custody schedule

The main benefit of negotiating is that it requires buy-in from both parents. Ideally, both parents end up satisfied and committed to the agreement.

Never agree to a custody schedule that you haven't evaluated carefully. If the other parent creates the schedule, consider whether it's age-appropriate for your children and realistic.

Other benefits of negotiating a custody schedule include:

• Saves you time and money because you don't have to file motions and meet with your lawyer nearly as often.
• Gives you some control of your court order. If you can't agree on a custody schedule, the court will choose one for you.
• Reduces animosity between parents.
• Makes you more likely to agree on schedule changes when needed.

Keep these benefits in mind when you feel like giving up and going to court.

Get help negotiating a custody schedule

Ask family and friends what schedules have worked well for them.

Your lawyer is another valuable resource. They can advise you on custody laws and look over a schedule you create.

Using a tool like Custody X Change can help keep things calm by showing you neutral options. You can create drafts together or separately, and you'll get visual and written descriptions for court.

Be prepared in case negotiations break down

If you and the other parent can't agree on a custody schedule, the family court will decide for you. It may first require you to attend classes or mediation to help you work together.

In case you go to trial, keep notes about your negotiations. (You can use a co-parenting journal.) Hang onto your proposed schedules so you can present them to the court.

Expect to renegotiate later

The schedule you negotiate today likely won't work forever, so you don't have to look ten years into the future. Focus on the next few years.

You can petition for a change in a custody schedule if the revision would benefit your children. Reasons to make changes might include a move, a new work schedule or remarriage. Your jurisdiction may have more specific rules about when you can request a change.

Here are the general steps to renegotiate a custody schedule:

1. Try to negotiate a revision.
2. File a motion in court (whether you reached agreement or not).
3. Show that the current schedule isn't working and how a modification would help.
4. If your judge agrees modification would be best for your child, they'll order a new schedule.

More schedule negotiation tips

1. Get familiar with your location's custody laws so your schedule has a better chance of being accepted by the court.
2. Negotiate a parenting plan at the same time.
3. Put your children first.
4. Clearly define your goals and priorities — for yourself and to your co-parent.
5. Understand that the court wants you to support the other parent's relationship with your child.

The easiest way to make a custody schedule

Creating a schedule on your own can feel overwhelming. To prepare for negotiations, you may want to make several schedules quickly, and you'll need them to look good.

The Custody X Change app takes the guesswork out of the equation by helping you build a schedule piece by piece.

Try this with Custody X Change.

As a result, you get a written schedule and a visual calendar. They meet your family's needs, as well as the court's standards.

For quick, reliable and affordable help making a custody schedule, turn to Custody X Change.