How To Write a Visitation Agreement Letter
A visitation agreement letter, also known as a visitation demand letter, is a way for a parent to ensure they get time with their child.
The parent sends the letter to the child's other parent to plan a visit or to officially inform them that they've violated their court order for parenting time.
Grandparents or other people awarded visits with a child may also use a visitation agreement letter.
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When you need a visitation agreement letter
Visitation agreement letters are generally only necessary in contentious parenting relationships. Most co-parents plan the details of visits less formally, e.g., by text message.
If the other parent has withheld the child from you previously or you anticipate issues, send a letter so that you'll have evidence if you need to go to court.
There are two situations in which you may send a visitation agreement letter:
- To arrange a visit
- To document a violation of a parenting-time order
Generally, the noncustodial parent sends a letter to the custodial parent.
What to put in a visitation agreement letter
If you're arranging a visit
Include details like:
- Name(s) of the child(ren)
- Start and end date(s) and times
- Exchange location(s)
- Any stipulations you've complied with (e.g., drug testing, arranging for roommates to vacate your house)
- Anything else the other parent needs to know (e.g., items the child should bring)
Rather than ask permission for the visit, state that you are planning on it.
Make sure everything you present follows your court order. If you have a parenting time schedule, this means your visit must comply with that schedule.
At the end of your letter, you could remind your co-parent that not complying with your court order could result in them being found in contempt of court.
If you're documenting denied parenting time
If you have been denied your rightful parenting time, the letter should take a different approach.
Include details like:
- What the court ordered for parenting time
- How and when the other parent denied you time
- Any remedies you want (e.g, a mediation session, a makeup visit)
- A deadline for response
- What may lead you to take legal action (e.g., if they deny you time again or don't respond by the deadline)
How to send a visitation agreement letter
You could send the letter by email or a co-parent messaging app if you regularly communicate with the parent that way.
However, if court seems likely, send the letter by certified mail with a return receipt requested. Keep a copy as proof of what you sent.
Your court order may have other rules — for example, how long before a visit you must send the letter. Follow all these rules.
Never give the letter to your child.
What else to do to get your time with your child
If your co-parent is being difficult, you need to document what's happening.
With the Custody X Change online app, you can track visits that are denied or cut short. See the effect on your total parenting time.
You can also document details in your Custody X Change journal. Typing up incidents shortly after they happen lends you credibility. Plus, you can upload evidence like a screenshot of your GPS location as you wait at the pickup point.
Get what you deserve — and what's best for your child — with Custody X Change.
Visualize your schedule. Get a written parenting plan. Calculate your parenting time.