What Happens if the Noncustodial Parent Misses Visitation?

Visitation (also called parenting time) allows your child to maintain a relationship with the parent they don't primarily live with.

Visitation may not always happen as scheduled in your court order. If your order covers what happens if the noncustodial parent misses visitation, the situation is easier to handle. If not, you run the risk of returning to court.

If the noncustodial parent misses some visitation

If the noncustodial parent provides notice that they will miss visitation, consider offering them a makeup visit at a later date. (See "Making up missed parenting time" below.) This shows that you're committed to ensuring your child has regular visits with the noncustodial parent, benefiting your child and your co-parenting relationship.

If the noncustodial parent misses visits without notice, send them a message you can print so you have proof. In your message, state what time they were supposed to be there, ask why they didn't give notice and remind them that they should follow the visitation schedule.

If you deny visitation, the noncustodial parent can take you to court. The court may side with you if you can show that you had good reasons to deny visitation. Otherwise, the court may change the custody order to give the noncustodial parent more time; it could also penalize you with fines or even jail time.

If the parent does not exercise visitation at all

Unfortunately, some parents do not value their visitation rights and choose not to show up for visits.

You can't take a mother or father to court to make them see their child. You can go to court to ask for a change of the custody order because the noncustodial parent never follows it. From there, the court may reduce the noncustodial parent's time or order them to attend a parenting class to learn about how their actions may affect their child.

Some noncustodial parents believe if they do not exercise visitation then they won't have to pay child support. This is untrue. They may end up owing more support as the custodial parent takes on a greater financial burden having the children in their care all the time.

The noncustodial parent's choice not to exercise visitation could make it easier to terminate parental rights. If you remarry, your new spouse could then adopt your child.

If the noncustodial parent is late picking up the child

Late pickups are not uncommon. When it becomes a recurring issue, you may have to reevaluate your schedule.

Tracking how late pickups impact parenting time will help you get an idea of how big of an issue the lateness is. Based on this, you can propose an order change to the court or discuss ways to adjust the schedule with the noncustodial parent. (You'll need to go to court to make any agreed changes official.)

Making up missed parenting time

Sometimes parents miss visits due to illness, emergencies or overlapping commitments.

Without guidance from a court order, it's up to parents to communicate how they will handle makeup parenting time. If the noncustodial parent gives sufficient notice, the easier path is to be courteous and reschedule the visit for a later date.

Consider declining makeup time for unexcused missed visits. Giving makeup time for unexcused missed visits may only encourage the noncustodial parent to continue disobeying the court order.

Planning for missed visitation

Plan ahead so you'll know what to do if the noncustodial parent misses visitation.

The Custody X Change online app helps you build a parenting plan that accounts for changes to parenting time. Choose from the preloaded provisions or create your own to explain what will happen when there's a late pickup or missed visit and how you'll manage makeup parenting time.

Custody X Change helps you create and maintain a fair, healthy visitation arrangement.