Successful Parenting Plans for Infants
You can write up a parenting plan for your infant on your own or with the other parent. Or, you can work with an attorney or legal professional and have them create it. If you don't want to pay the high cost of an attorney, and want to create your own agreement, use the Custody X Change software.
Custody X Change is software that creates parenting plans. You create each part of your agreement, then print out professional documents of your plan. Download a free 30-day trial and see how it can help you.
You can use Custody X Change to:
- Explore options for your parenting plan
- Negotiate an agreement with the other parent
- Work with your attorney to come up with a parenting plan you like
- Prepare sample agreements for mediation
- Make a plan to present in court
- Track your plan once it is in place
You need to have a good parenting plan if you want your infant to develop secure bonds, attach emotionally, and feel comfortable with both parents. Babies between 3 and 9 months old thrive physically and emotionally when they are exposed to a consistent routine of feeding, sleeping and play. Your plan can provide this consistent routine.
Infants can recognize familiar objects, like a certain stuffed animal or their own crib. They can also recognize faces and voices quite well. Memory is fairly limited in infants and their concept of time is poor. It's detrimental for an infant to spend too much time away from their primary caregiver. A comprehensive parenting plan tailored to an infant's needs keeps both of you united when it comes to parenting your infant, despite separate households.
Custody X Change can help you create a plan that is fair to both parents and creates a stable and healthy schedule for your baby.
To properly bond with your infant, your parenting plan should include a fairly rigid schedule with short but frequent exposure to both parents. Make an effort to allow both of you to participate in caregiving routines to ensure the healthiest emotional attachments.
The important caregiving routines are:
- Feeding
- Diapering
- Bathing
- Playing, singing and talking
- Comforting and soothing
- Cuddling and other loving physical contact
- Going to bed
The Custody X Change software can help you create a parenting plan that outlines when those crucial moments occur in your baby's life. That way, you both have the opportunity to strengthen the bond of trust and reliance that is a big part of proper infant development.
Help your infant adjust to any changes brought on by the parenting plan by transitioning slowly. Child development experts agree that changes in an infant's routine and surroundings must be introduced gradually. As the baby becomes accustomed to a new situation with minimal stress, you can slowly implement other changes.
For example, enact small changes every two weeks as long as your baby shows few to no signs of stress. The idea is to structure your parenting plan so you both can work slowly toward the desired goal -- stress-free visits with both parents.
Here is a sample of how you and the other parent might introduce change slowly through your parenting plan, assuming you are the primary caregiver:
- Allow the other parent a few short visits per day to perform key caregiver tasks such as diapering and feeding.
- Lengthen visits incrementally as the infant exhibits ease and comfort with the other parent.
- Leave the other parent alone with the infant for a short visit once per week for a few weeks.
- Increase the duration of the other parent's weekly solo visit.
- Schedule more frequent solo visits with the other parent during the week.
To make sure you and the other parent are completely clear on when these visits will occur and for how long, use Custody X Change software to create workable, easy-to-read calendars that can be printed out and synced to mobile devices.
When a parenting plan is not working well, it will create stress and anxiety in your infant. Your baby may behave differently than normal due to significant changes brought on too soon by your parenting plan.
Your baby will show stress in one or several of these ways:
- He doesn't eat much or at all compared to previous meals
- She has significantly different bowel movements
- He doesn't sleep as long or as deeply as before
- She is irritable and doesn't seem content
- He cries more than normal
- She is lethargic and doesn't interact like she use to
- He has tense muscles and arches his back
- She has a higher motor activity level than normal
Note any changes in your baby's normal behavior in a daily parenting journal so that you and the other parent can evaluate what may be due to illness, normal development or stress. If you notice signs of stress in your baby, it may be that a new change is too overwhelming at this point and should be re-introduced in a few weeks.
Custody X Change makes keeping an electronic journal easy and you can print out reports for evaluation as needed..
The key to managing sudden changes to your parenting plan is open, honest communication with the other parent. It's critical to stay in touch with each other and be flexible so you can both adapt and adjust the schedule. Do your best to keep your baby from experiencing radical and abrupt changes.
Common issues that require sudden change might include:
- Regression in the infant's behavior and adaptability
- Illness for you, the other parent or the infant
- Injury for you, the other parent or the infant
- Work schedules, long meetings or business trips
- Holidays and vacations
- Third-party time, such as visiting grandparents
- Changes to a sibling's schedule
Babies do much better with surprises and emergencies when a strong foundation of trust has already been established. Custody X Change software allows parents to make weekly and even daily changes to the schedule so unusual circumstances can be managed better.
Your parenting plan for infants should be revised frequently, due to their rapid growth and development. When your baby reaches certain developmental milestones, you can discuss any modifications to the parenting plan and implement changes gradually. For example, something that is appropriate for a child at 6 months may no longer apply when the child reaches 9 months.
Some parents set a specific time frame to review their parenting plan, such as every 6 weeks. Others wait until they observe their infant achieving success in some area.
An example of this might be scheduling an overnight stay after noting your baby takes long, peaceful naps at the non-primary caregiver's residence. Custody X Change software keeps your most recent schedule right on your computer and mobile devices so both parents can stay on top of the latest changes.
It's best to move slowly, watch your infant closely and be willing to compromise and communicate on revisions to create the best parenting plan possible for each stage of your child's life.
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