Child Custody Issues & Visitation Problems

When parents divorce there are many issues to figure out regarding the children. Creating a child custody plan can be difficult because there are so many issues that need to be addressed. It is a stressful time and you may not be on the best of terms with the other parent.

It is only natural to worry and feel overwhelmed at the prospect of leaving something out of your parenting plan or making a mistake. Sometimes people will direct this tension at the other parent, which is never a good idea. You need to stay focused and constructive.

Even though it may be hard to reach an agreement, you will need to plan out all of the rules and regulations you each will follow. You will need to put careful thought and consideration into your plan as it will serve as the guidelines for raising your children to adulthood.

You will need to figure out how much time the children will spend with each parent, if the children will have a residence with one parent while visiting the other, how the holidays will be divided, how the pick up and drop off times will go, etc. The list really goes on and on.

Most divorcing couple find themselves in disagreement at some time or another in the course of their custody case. The key is to address the problems in a manner that prevents your custody case from turning into a custody dispute or even a custody battle.

One of the most common issues divorcing parents have is deciding on a custody and visitation schedule.

Usually both parents want to have their children as much as possible. This is because they will miss them and they want to remain a big part of their children's lives.

Sometimes child support plays a factor in the amount of time a parent wishes to have their children. The thought of paying money to the other parent (or receiving money from the other parent) for child support obligations can lead some people to act selfishly in their quest for custody. The courts are very good at discerning the sincerity of custody requests.

Some other issues many people find they are faced with are:

• Who is responsible for transporting the children and paying the transportation costs
• What to do about the children's belongings between the two homes
• How will discipline be handled between the two homes
• How will routines, such as established bed times or dietary habits, be handled between two homes
• How to keep your children from being exposed to people you don't want them around
• When can each parent communicate with the children when they aren't in their physical care
• Who is responsible for paying the "extras", such as orthodontics or summer camp
• Which parent will attend parent teacher conferences and extra-curricular activities
• How will you make sure the other parent doesn't talk negatively about you to your children

This list of things parents might have issues with can go on and on. The important thing to remember is that you should be making custody decisions based on what is best for your child.

Fortunately, Custody X Change can help you work out many of your custody problems.

Custody X Change is custody software that helps parents create custody agreements and parenting plans.

You can use the program to set up your custody and visitation schedule, a holiday schedule, vacation time, and special events. All of this is applied to a calendar so you have a nice, clear view of when the children are with each parent.

The program provides you with time-share and overnight percentages so both parents know exactly how much time they have with their children. This number is also crucial in determining child support.

In addition to the custody calendar, the program lets you add parenting provisions to your plan.

For example, you may select whether or not you would like to be notified if the other parent gets the child a passport. There are plenty of provisions to choose from and you may also add in your own stipulations.

All of this prints out into professional documents containing your parenting plan and a calendar view of the schedule. You will also have a report describing the custody and visitation schedule with all of the components, the provisions, and a time-share report.

These documents can be used to present a case in court, to prepare for mediation, to meet with and work with the other parent to come up with an agreement, etc. They can also be exported to Word and PDF so you can change the wording and/or e-mail them.

The program is simple to use. If you can turn on your computer and type, you will be able to use Custody X Change with ease. If you DO happen to get stuck, the program includes step-by-step tutorials to help you.

One of the hardest things to do when creating a parenting plan is to work with the other parent. After all, you've ended your romantic relationship with them and it was probably for a good reason.

It is important that you keep in mind that your relationship with your ex is not ending. It has just changed. You are still your children's parents and you will need to learn how to work together for the sake of your children.

Working together to create your parenting plan is a good place to start having a civil relationship with your former spouse. Getting along with the other parent will make the future a lot more pleasant.

Even couples that have parted as friends will have issues they disagree on. You may want to start on common ground and build your custody agreement on the items that you DO agree on.

One of the great things about the Custody X Change software is it is easy to use and it is easy to make changes to your custody plan. It can be a very useful tool when you are trying to reach an agreement with the other parent.

You can use Custody X Change with the other parent either directly or indirectly. The way you use it to negotiate with them may depend on the nature of your relationship.

If you are able to comfortably be in the same room together, you can sit down at the computer and go through the software together. It is much easier to agree on things when they are divided up into individual questions.

Here are some suggestions for working on the plan together:

• Go through the program and start with the items you agree on.
• Skip over items that you do not agree on.
• Revisit the items you could not agree on and make changes.
• Save what you have agreed on and give yourselves some time to think about the items that are in dispute.
• If you are still unable to agree on some issues, you will have what you DO agree on to present to a mediator or the judge and you can get help with the rest.

If you are not able to work with the other parent in person, you can create your proposed parenting plan with Custody X Change and print out a copy to give to the other parent.

This removes some of the hostility from the situation as you will both be dealing with your documents instead of each other directly.

Here are some suggestions for working with the other parent indirectly:

• Use the software and create the parenting plan that you would like.
• Print a copy of your proposed custody agreement and present it to the other parent.
• Ask the other parent to consider the parenting plan and to acknowledge which sections they agree on and which items they disagree with.
• Ask the other parent to offer suggestions or alternatives to the items they do not want to agree to.
• Be prepared to consider the wishes of the other parent and compromise on reasonable requests.
• Make revisions to your plan and ask the other parent to review it again.
• Continue in this manner until it is obvious that you have reached the point where no further progress will be made.

Once negotiation attempts with the other parent have stalled, you may present your parenting plan to a mediator or to the court. You should highlight the items you have already agreed upon and include your proposed portions of the plan.

Basically, Custody X Change makes it easy to handle the majority of your custody issues. Download a free trial and see how it can help you.