When you create a parenting plan for your infant, schedule as much time as possible for each parent to develop a relationship with the baby. A successful custody schedule puts the needs of the infant first, rather than the personal preferences of the parents.
An infant’s whole world centers around eating, sleeping and develop trust in his or her caregivers. Infants need predictable schedules with loving contact in a familiar environment in order to thrive. While your infant will develop a strong attachment to his or her primary caregiver, the secondary caretaker is definitely an important part of your infant’s life.
Primary Caregiver. The amount of time your infant spends with his or her primary caregiver reinforces feelings of security, comfort and trust. The primary caregiver should maximize bonding time by providing for your infant’s immediate needs, such as feeding and diapering. Other bonding moments occur during the times your infant is awake and alert. Focus on speaking, singing and cuddling your infant to develop a familiar, comfortable routine.
Secondary Caregiver. While the secondary caregiver will not spend as much time with your infant, that parent will still develop strong attachments with the infant. In fact, as the secondary caregiver makes frequent short visits throughout the week and participates in basic caregiving activities, the infant’s comfort level will increase. Eventually, the infant will feel secure with both parents and visits can be lengthened as the child grows.
Best Infant Schedule. When creating your parenting plan, schedule short, frequent visits with the secondary caretaker. Avoid overnight visits for infants until they are older and better able to handle transitions. Child psychology experts agree that infants should spend no more than eight hours away from the primary caregiver, especially newborns.
Visiting Newborns. Newborns, considered to be infants between 0 and 3 months old, require even more attention than infants. In your parenting plan for your newborn, don’t forget to schedule feeding times every 2 to 3 hours, because newborns eat frequently. Breast feeding your newborn may force both of you to limit visiting times until the child graduates to formula or cereal.
Change Slowly. Keep in mind that infants grow and develop rather quickly, so visiting times with both parents can be adjusted as the child reaches new milestones. When you and the other parent make the effort to show your infant that he or she can rely on both of you for quality care, stability and love, visits can be modified so that you both enjoy maximum time with your child.